Camping

I’m thinking of going camping. I’m saving up and I’m gonna get a tent, and a stove and a sleeping bag. And then I’m gonna tell my parents that I bought a house.

They may not believe me and will want to see pictures. So I’ll have to tell them that they never believed in me, and hang up.

Eventually they’ll know not to ask about that. But they may try to get smart, and come visit.

And then I’ll be in trouble. But I’ll get out of it by taking them camping. And they’ll be disappointed because they wanted to see my house. And they’ll say to each other, ‘I guess he was just lying to make us proud of him.’

Then they might feel pretty bad for making me think I have to do all that. And they’ll tell me, ‘Son, you know we’re always proud of you, right? And we love you, no matter what?’

I’ll say yeah, I know. I’ll tell them I had to sell the house because the government needed to build a new highway there. And that maybe I’ll get another one soon, but it’s not really a ‘buyer’s market’ now.

But then maybe I’ll come clean and admit that I was just joking, and that I just got this tent, and this stove and sleeping bag. And that’s kind of like a house, isn’t it? When you think about it? Then we’ll all laugh but they might sort of glance at each other like, ‘When will this fantasy end?’

In any case we’ll go to sleep under the stars, thinking how nice it is to be together, and also what does it all mean, and do you ever actually know a person?

In the morning maybe I’ll make coffee on my stove, or maybe we’ll go to a nice coffee shop, and my dad will pay.

They’ll have a pretty nice trip all in all. Having seen some sights, and gotten to spend time with me. They’d think maybe he’ll be alright anyway, whatever happens.

I’ll probably end up showing them my apartment after all and even introducing them to all my roommates, including the ones I haven’t met yet.

I’ll drive them to the airport, and we’ll hug each other and say goodbye. It’ll be sad, but then my dad will most likely slip me a fifty.

And driving away I might think how I’m kind of over camping now. And I wonder if I can sell this gear? Probably. I can probably do whatever I put my mind to.